Proud of Your Boy
by ohdearbabybird
Summary: Long ago, a little boy was left alone with his brother on a ship as his father ran away. What happens when this little boy has now grown up and has a son of his own? Two part fluff piece Daddy! Killian.


_Baby Jones  
_

His eyes lingered on the surname, so pointedly written on this placecard to distinguish the different babies in the nursery. It was a quiet night in Storybrooke and only his child was sleeping away, peacefully in his bassinet.

"Killian, do you want to hold him?" Dr. Whale asked, before he swiped his card to enter the nursery room.

He internally struggled with what to say, and the fact of that made his heart heavy. Trepidation began to set in, but he quickly quelled those voices inside his head and quietly nodded, following Whale inside.

This wasn't the first time he held their son, but it felt momentous in his mind because this was the first time he was alone with their son. The little baby squirmed in his arms, trying to adjust to its new sleeping place, and it reminded him of his Emma, who was also quite a restless sleeper.

"Just like your mother," he whispered, chuckling fondly at the memories of waking up to Emma's foot in his side or arm flung over his face.

Killian's voice was soft and gentle and as if recognizing that this was his father, his son hesitantly opened his eyes. Blue met blue.

"Well hello there, little one," Killian greeted, as he moved to adjust his fake hand to provide better support for the baby's head.

 _What do I say now?_ Killian wondered inside his head. He was a smooth talker, quick witted pirate and right now he had no words. For the past nine months since Emma told him that she was pregnant, he had been over the bloody moon excited, but also super nervous. A child of their own that they would raise from the start- he and Swan had no experience dealing with that.

 _He laid in bed, her head resting on his chest, as his hand mindlessly played with the ends of her hair. Quiet moments were more frequent now, but they were cherished and appreciated just as much. For all that they've been through, every challenge and hurdle, he wasn't sure that he would ever just have these little moments with Emma, in their home. But Operation Light Swan was a success and he found himself living his happy ending._

 _Emma's bump was growing and Killian being the scholar that he was, made sure he read every book in the Storybrooke library that had anything to do with pregnancy. It made for entertaining doctor visits with Whale, for sure. And as he read more, Killian became more nervous (though still very excited) for the arrival of their boy._

" _Do you think we can do it?" Emma's voice interrupted the quiet, but peaceful silence that fell over their bedroom. "Be good parents?"_

 _It was a question he often asked himself. They had Henry, but they shared custody of him and Henry was already ten years old when he found Emma. But never once did he question Emma's ability in this._

 _He lifted her head, tilting her chin up so that he could look at her as he said this. "You, love, are going to be a wonderful mother. There's not a single question in my mind."_

 _The uncertainty that laid in her eyes was put to rest and a small smile adorned her face. She reached forward to hold his face in her hands, "You're going to be an amazing dad. I see it every day with Henry and I know our child is going to be one of the luckiest kids around to have you as their father." Her voice fierce in determination to make him believe that. She could feel the doubt that rest in the back of Killian's mind and she wanted to help him see what she saw, what she knew._

 _His smile in response did not reach his eyes and she knew it- he couldn't hide it from her. "You're nothing like him."_

 _A deep breath escaped his chest, and he quietly nodded. He placed a kiss on her forehead before she resumed her previous position back on his chest. His right hand gently covered the small bump as he internally vowed to himself and to his unborn child that he would do right by them._

It shouldn't be this hard, but Killian did not want to mess up, in any way, even the smallest way, because he never wanted his son to feel the disappointment he felt towards his father, that burdened his soul. He could never imagine leaving his family behind, knowing that they would have to pay for his disappearance. He could never live with the guilt that he abandoned his children, left them to face the harsh cruel world without the love of a parent. Even after all these years, everything that he had been through, the anger was still there. He still felt like the little boy that was left alone on this ship in the middle of the night centuries ago.

As if sensing his father's pain, the young child in his arms cooed, bringing Killian's attention back to him. Anger and disappointment were quickly replaced with happiness and Killian placed a kiss on his son's forehead. Killian immediately knew exactly what he had to say.

"I hope, lad, that this will be the first of many father-son chats. Your brother, Henry, seems to be fond of them with me and I hope you will be too. Your mother and I have been waiting for you and now that you're here, I won't lie to you, son, I'm terrified. I don't want to let you down. I had a father- he would tuck me and my brother into bed at night, he would tell us bedtime stories and quell our nightmares. But one night, the nightmare turned into reality when he ran away. I'll never do that to you, my boy. I'll always be here." Although there was no way that his son understood any of what he saying, the young baby had kept his eyes on Killian through it all.

Killian smiled down at his son, who bore such a resemblance to him, that Emma delightfully teased that he had a mini-me.

"My father once told me that we're all braver than we think, if we just look inside ourselves. I can't promise I won't make mistakes, but a good man owns up to them and I won't be a coward. I'll teach you about honor and good form and I'll fight with everything I've got for you. You'll never have to question that."

For many centuries, his father's betrayal had weighed heavily on Killian's heart, but today, with the arrival of his son, he found healing. The question echoed in his head, _what kind of man do you, Killian, want to be?_

"I want to be a man that you and your mother can be proud of."

He figured he should get back to Emma before she began to worry, so he carefully placed his son back in the bassinet.

"Sleep well, little one. I love you."


End file.
